Sunday, September 24, 2006
I'm sorry. There have been many instances where I have betrayed your trust, and I know that I tend to hurt your feelings. But this was never how I have wanted things to end up. And I know none of you want this to happen either. And I guess it's time I let everything out.
Things have never been easy. I'm sure you'll say that, yeah, everyone has their share of problems, but I guess in the end, it's how much pressure you can take inside of you. When you have absolutely nothing to hang on to, no one to listen to you, it starts to eat you up from the inside. And I guess it gets worse when you begin to lose everything you have stood up for.
Over the years, things change. People change. I know I can't have everything the way they have always been, even when that is what I have always wanted. But sometimes it is just painful when even the best of buddies suddenly begin to have doubts about each other.
I admit I have talked behind you back before. I guess I was jealous of the fun happenings in your life, but most of all, I was angry that you changed into someone who was so different than the one I knew back then. I used to be able to talk to you, but now we seem so distant. I miss the old girl I could cry with, but now I'm beginning to accept who you are. And I thank you for making an effort to blog about this. Though I knew you would not care anymore. Sorry again, my dear friend. (if I can still call you that)I have always hoped that nothing will come between you and me. Things did not turn out that way. Never let anything come between us all. Enough of those doubts between each other. They will never bring any good to us. They only make us distance ourselves from the true feelings that we have.If you're leaving, please don't turn back and hurt us all again. And my only wish is for you to stay.
somebody save me;
i'm not crazy or anything.
10:29 PM
