Wednesday, September 28, 2005
Happy Birthday, Mummy. (:My mum's cousin died yesterday. They share the same granfather but had different grandmummays. And its so sad cause she's only 28 this year. Hard life,she lead. Unexpected death,leaving two small children. Poor boys did not even know their father. She married their father when she was in her teens, NEVER knowing he was more into drugs than her. Five painful years and she finally let him go. Raising 2 boys was surely never easy for her. And then one day,she had a headache and just collapse. Ambulance came, took her away from her boys. Never did they know that moments before were her last moments with them. Hospital said she broke a blood vessel, up there in her brain. News cut deep like lighting, almost killing her father and relatives. They also mentioned something about never waking up ever again. Brain dead, the correct term. And then her whole system failed on her. Just in a moment. Can somebody please explain, please explain what exactly happened to her? Why did she have to go at that age and why such a painful death? Who's gonna explain everything to her boys? Whos gonna be there for them like how she was there? They are young children. So much younger than me and yet they already have to go through a painful stage in life. I dont know what i would do if anything harsh like that would happen to me. I would'nt know how to comtinue my life. But i believe they would. Please god, make them strong. This whole incident, it makes me appreciate what i have with me which won't be here forever. After all, nothing last forever. Its painful to see how a father loves his children so much, he would do just about anything for them. Its painful cause most of the time all their children care about is their own feelings. All they say is " no one understands me". But really, do they even bother trying to understand anyone else around? I can never seem to get over the lost of -. i love - so dearly. Only someone who loves a - as much as i do would feel it. But not just merely anyone. Thats why i don't cry my hearts out to everyone. And its weird how even the closest does not know. And i guess i have gotten oover - but i'll never stop loving -. i'm here, just like i said. Though its breaking every single rule i've ever made.
somebody save me;
i'm not crazy or anything.
6:00 PM
